Our Babies, Ourselves

Our Babies, Ourselves: How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Parent, a book written by Meredith F. Small, is a fascinating read. Small is an ethnopediatrician, which is a relatively new field of study that concerns children. It is somewhat a biological field melded with an anthropological one. Pushing aside the learned terms, however, the book is simply a great read.

Small's first chapter focuses on the evolution of human babies (and human mothers' pelvis). Depending on views on evolution and specific evolutionary theory, this chapter may seem to ring true, or it may not. Some of it felt a little far fetched to me. It is coming from speculation based on little evidence and not hard facts. It does try to explain why babies have evolved with a need to be "attached" to a caregiver.

The second chapter of Our Babies covers more theory. It discusses basic theories of parental behavior and infant behavior. Small delves some into the "nature versus nurture" debate. She's pretty balanced in her views. She also discusses the specific field of ethnopediatrics in depth.

Chapter three is a brief cross-cultural study. The chapter opens by describing the difference between "traditional" and "industrial" societies. Small then begins a whirlwind overview of five different cultures and their baby-rearing attitudes. It is a fascinating glimpse. The chapter left me wanting more - not because Small didn't include enough information, but because she gave just enough of a glimpse to make me want more than just a glimpse of each society. She piques the reader's interest to know how parents in other societies do things, which is probably exactly what she was hoping for!

Studying Baby Behavior

Small spends a chapter discussing infant sleep. She reviews research by Dr. James McKenna, a noted infant sleep expert. She gives a review of how other cultures approach baby sleep and what they consider "normal." The chapter concludes that most cultures accept babies into the beds of the parents, or at least very close by, and that they do not expect babies to sleep through the night as we in the Western world do.

The chapter on crying is extensive. Small covers everything from scientific "crying curves" to cultural thoughts about and responses to crying. She discusses how different cultures sooth their babies. She also reviews temperament, and studies trying to prove whether it is an inborn or learned trait. This chapter also has some lovely black and white pictures in it. This chapter also discusses an infant's need to be constantly with an adult and spend a lot of time in-arms or attached to the caregiver in some way.

The chapter on infant feeding is again an interesting cross-cultural comparison. She gives a possible scenario for the development of lactation in our species that made my stomach turn a little when I read it. She admits that it is not in any way proved and is simply speculation. "Maternal ooze" is not a glamorous thing to consider breast milk evolving from! But the chapter is a good one once she delves into how breastfeeding works, and how different cultures approach breastfeeding. Small does make a comment that if lactation is not started within the first few days and the mother's milk "dries up" that the opportunity to breastfeed is lost. This does not have to be true and is in fact proved false by many mothers re-lactating for their babies or inducing lactation for adopted babies, even if they never build a full milk supply.

The cross-cultural examination of breastfeeding is as fascinating as the rest of the comparisons in the book. I found that her comments about how "not making enough milk" seems to be a uniquely Western phenomenon to be very interesting.

Wrapping Up Observations

Small's closing chapter brings up her observations in a neat package, and reviews a few more about how relative "normal" is to who you are asking about "normal." She notes that what may seem to be "normal" baby care for one culture seems quite strange, even shocking or disturbing, for another. Our Babies challenges parents to do what feels right for them and for their babies, and not follow what culture has prescribed for us.

I really enjoyed this book. It gives a wide overview of infant care practices across the world and is presented in a clear and logical manner. It is not a parenting book, really, but it does give affirmation for making instinctual parenting choices. It is a great book for anyone who is interested in infant care in other cultures. It is also a good book for parents needing encouragement that what they are doing is best for their baby even when society says it's not (especially for issues such as co-sleeping and baby wearing.)

The book goes into far more detail than I have in this review. There is about a chapter-sized section of references, making this work an excellent jumping off point for further study in any of the specific areas that Small covers.

Natural Birth and Baby Care.com